The story thus far. .

My name is Paula, and I am fat.
I almost feel like I should be stood up saying that; with 10 or 12 other fat people applauding my bravey for admitting my crime against society. Not that I'm bitter or anything.
Actually, I'm not you know. Bitter that is. I've spent so many years blaming 'time and circumstance' for where I am, and at some point the realisation hit me that it really is down to me. Sure, I could lay a portion of guilt at the feet of all those who hurt me and sent me diving head-first into a tub of Ben & Jerry's, but ultimately it was me who found solace in the food. It was me who chose to band-aid every hurt and injustice with a family sized chocolate bar or a cheeseburger... often both, as I recall.
For the 125th (or thereabouts) time in my life, I am on a quest to lose this extra person I am carrying about with me. The difference this time (I hope against all hope) is that my head is finally in the right place. I finally understand the cost of what I have done to my body, and the very real possibility that death is the most likely outcome.
On April 15th, weighing in at 24st 2lb, I decided to try The Cambridge Diet. You know, the one where you live on shakes or soups for however long it takes you to lose your excess weight. It costs £40 a week; and for that you get your 21 meals and a one-to-one session with your local Cambridge Diet Counsellor. I have to say, I managed pretty well for the first week, and I lost a massive 12lb. The second week wasn't so great and I ended up having a massive binge. So, Cambridge Diet 1 - Paula nil.
Having lost the 12lb, I knew I wanted to continue on my journey, and I decided to rejoin Weight Watchers for the 7th time. The last time I did WW was the beginning of last year, and I did manage to lose about 38lb before I fell off the wagon and never got back on. (Do you see a pattern here?) So, on Friday 1st May I re-joined my local WW class, weighing in at 23st 5lb. Joy of joy as I realised I had managed to keep off 11lb of the 12lb Cambridge loss.
My first week went without a hitch, I enjoyed feeling in control (and FED) and managed to lose 7lbs. So, my current weight is 22st 12lb.
If you're still awake I applaud you! Tune in later for my next update... possibly entitled The Harvester or Purgatory. . . .